My heart goes to you..
October 6, 2010 § 12 Comments
This morning as I was spending time with God I stumbled upon something that ripped my heart to pieces. I was trying to see if my blog would come up in search engines, but instead I found the cries of my kind.
These forums, blogs and posts are titled: “Pastor kid’s syndrome”, “Don’t pastor’s kids make the best atheist?” and “I love God but hate the church”. Real Pastor’s kids talking about their struggles and desperation. The reason why I can relate to them is because I am one. Click here to read about me
Here are some of those posts: (click the titles to read the full version) — forgive some of the language
“To start, I am a PK. I was raised in a family with an extreme addiction to religion. I cant even begin to explain how much I hate God and my parents. The old saying of how “pastors children are either ‘really good’ or ‘really bad'(to be horribly cliche) holds true in my case. I, as some would nominalize my actions to be, have turned completely from the things of God. In having Christianity shoved down my goddamn fucking throat for 18 years I was only too ready to leave it behind my freshman year in college.”
“I find it interesting that throughout my whole life I have been able to relate with other pks and they have been some of my better friends. I feel that there is pressure for me to follow in my fathers footsteps however that is not the direction I feel I want to take. I have been
critized, stepped on and continue to feel like I am not meeting some expectations that I’m supposed to meet.”
“I’m glad for my background in religion and the knowledge and experience I have gained from being a preacher’s kid, but I don’t really believe in God. And I am completely against fundamentalism. It’s hard to get along with my parents, especially when they talk about “sins” like homosexuality, or pre-marital sex, or how my mom ignores scientific facts because of what the Bible said.”
“I’m a PK, but I feel like I’ve been rejected by the church. I don’t know how it is elsewhere, but the churches I’ve experienced weren’t willing to accept me and I always felt left out. I hated going to church. I looked forward to worship and praying to God but dreaded the awkward silence I had to undergo just because I didn’t have any friends at church.”
“I think that maybe being a PK pushed me to challenge God. I was expected to know things about religion and to be honest I did, I always joked with my friends and said, “I know how to do the God talk”. It just took me a while to finally understand that faith is really just about a personal relationship with Jesus. It wasn’t the facts I struggled with, It was the spirit.”
My heart goes out to each one of you who are struggling out there. Being a pastor kid does not mean you have found Jesus. “Pastor’s kid” is a status, and status is an “it”. Religion is an “it”. But Jesus is a “Him”. He is a person, alive and well. Don’t listen to the lies of the devil and settle for religion. Christianity is about relationship.
I truly believe that there are certain groups of people in our life that only us have the access to relate to and share Christ with.